Reality

I was over at someone's house tonight, and one of the guys there was watching television - something I haven't done in years. I was initially curious, then amused, then left extremely disturbed at the sights I saw on TV - you see when I last saw a TV show, reality television was still not 'in'. There were a couple of shows which were trying it, but it had not really caught on as a 'fad' i guess. But now, there are entire channels devoted to reality shows. It was probably a similar reaction to what our parents might have felt when MTV came on the screen - "They are now showing this new rock n stone music on TV!" - but I definitely felt old watching these new shows to which I have nothing in my experience to compare them to and feel comfortable watching them,

anyway, this led to a series of thoughts on the natural tendency to do good in the average individual (note : the average individual who will serve as a test bed for these theories is myself, for want of a better guinea pig). question: where does the human mind draw the line on decent/indecent, good/bad and so on? these moral 'boundaries' we have in our head - how malleable are they? There was certainly a time in my life, when I thought using swear words was wrong. Then was a time with swear words in every sentence. But now I feel like I have reached the stage where it is ok to use them every once in a while, but not in front of strangers or people who you think might be offended. But today there are things in life which I think are loathsome (crazy sexual exchanges, murder, crazy sexual exchanges with a murderer, etc) but maybe there might come a day when these things are acceptable to me, or the people around me. maybe someday a very terry pratchett-like assassins' guild might form and instruct children on the correct approach to murder (ie. without being on the receiving end of such an instruction).

so the point is, is there a line which no man will ever cross? after watching TV shows today, my answer has to be a no.

next question: is man essentially bad, and wants to be good? or vice-versa?

by "man" here, i refer to the intuitive notion of the soul of the average person (you or me). now, as for me, i think i am essentially good. but how much of that is me convincing myself because I have such an endemic feeling that being a "good" person is important for my own happiness, therefore I will never think of myself as being a bad person. so, i guess it is impossible to answer that question about myself, simply because no amount of introspection is going to allow me a perfectly unbiased standpoint from which to judge myself.

hence, i choose a third person - the proverbial "One" in a conversation - now,

... story deleted because it was way too disturbing ....

Just to give an idea as to how bad it was, it ends with ...

And then Anna calls - she's pregnant. The child is his because she didn't fuck anyone else, you lying bastard. And I'm keeping it too! (Conscience: fucked)

This is the final straw. Neo is back in Paris ... this time with a loaded weapon ....


Reader: NO!
Author (ME): Obviously not, I wouldn't allow one of my charactes to kill a pregnant woman. How crazy do you think I am? One probably kills himself and there ends my tale of woe for our lonely survivor on the reality TV show called life. The question still remains? Was One essentially good? Did he just have a tough time and the lying, fighting, and killing was just a result of an essentially good person having a hard time of life? That's for you to decide, dear Reader, for I am sleepy now. And wish to ...